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I am happy to post this follow up, I just bumped into your friend and mine (the man who failed to TP check). We exchanged hello’s before entering the bathroom (of course all i can think about was his last experience I overheard). I go to the urinal as I notice he is hesitant this time, I see him go past each stall and takes his time to make sure everything was in order he found the right one, and went in. I’m glad he did the right checks this time and I’m sure he is to, until next time… happy stall hunting!

Jason’s Log October 6, 2005 3:04 PM

I enter the bathroom at my job and headed directly for my favorite stall (everybody has one), I do the usual checks, seat protector paper CHECK, not too much diarrhea sprayed on the inside of the bowl and around the vicinity CHECK, toilet paper BAM!!! No Good-all out… time to move on to the next stall. Everything was in order at this one, I sit and begin to do my best thinking.
About this time a fellow employee strolls in, I can already tell who he is by the sound of his steps (don’t ask), he sits and fails to take part in the checks I performed, this would lead to a laughing fit for me and a very uncomfortable sitting situation for him… anyway on with the story. So this guy immediately rips an 8 second squeezed, high pitch fart (sounds like a kid using his mouth on his arm, like we all used to do) after the fart dies out the guy says “Excuse Me”, I’m sitting there with my hand over my mouth holding back laughter, how i held it in was the will power of steel that I possess, not only did this guy fail to check for TP but he goes as far to excuse himself for farting in a bathroom. This goes on for another 5 minutes or so, his funny farting and me turning red with tears from my eyes… finally he is finished. Now this is where the suspense comes into play, no TP… and the wettest nastiest farts you can imagine, this guy can’t just get up and get on with his day, what ever will he do?
My first thought was, he was bold enough to excuse himself I’m pretty sure he will ask me for some toilet paper which i would gladly pass underneath the walls, but no… this guy goes a different route, he uses the seat protection papers, ruffles them up and wipes his ass. The sound this thing was making made my ass hurt, scratching and scraping… this poor guy. Well he finishes mutilating his ass, leaves and I let out a well deserved laugh. Yes folks I could of said something from the start, I could of just offered toilet paper without having been asked, but ya know what… that wouldn’t of taught this guy the lesson to always check around before sitting down.

JAY’s ALTERNATIVE: Had it been I who failed to do the appropriate checks, I would of handled this situation a bit different (and I’m sure I’m not alone on this one). 1st I would’ve waited till the bathroom was empty (this happens every 10 minutes or so), 2nd I would’ve waited till the hall-way was empty (not as frequent, but it does happen), 3rd SIEZE THE MOMENT! and quickly slide into the next stall, assuming the TP is all good here I’d say you are home free and your ass will thank you for it.

Till next time, happy stall hunting!

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